Highlights of My Day
1. Drank a fifth of Jack Daniels and played Nintendo's Duck Hunt
2. Started feeling guilty around stage 7, and I turned the gun on myself
3. Began dating Katie Holmes to promote my upcoming birthday
4. Learned the difference between cereal sprinkled with sugar and cereal sprinkled with crystal meth
5. 99.9% sure the guy in front of me at Starbucks sharted his pants
6. Put a 1/4 stick of dynamite in my buddy's next-door-neighbor's grill
7. Pretty sure I ruined an upcoming cookout
8. Perfected my ability to pick things up with my toes
9. Told a kid at Blockbuster that he had head-lice
10. Asked my waitress where she learned to toss a salad so well
2. Started feeling guilty around stage 7, and I turned the gun on myself
3. Began dating Katie Holmes to promote my upcoming birthday
4. Learned the difference between cereal sprinkled with sugar and cereal sprinkled with crystal meth
5. 99.9% sure the guy in front of me at Starbucks sharted his pants
6. Put a 1/4 stick of dynamite in my buddy's next-door-neighbor's grill
7. Pretty sure I ruined an upcoming cookout
8. Perfected my ability to pick things up with my toes
9. Told a kid at Blockbuster that he had head-lice
10. Asked my waitress where she learned to toss a salad so well
posted by immixmarketer at 2:49 AM
23 Comments:
haha..and what did she say, when you asked her about salad tossing?
Regarding #4, I'm sure you did.
re: #7
How did you ruin an upcoming event? Did you affirmatively RSVP?
I like your blog. It makes for interesting reading in a world where many of the blogs seem to have only ads on them or something to do with gibberish and world war two. I noticed this when I hit the "next blog" button. ( question: does the same thing happen to everyone else?) Great writing!
Whatever do you mean?
Akjbgkj olweriu lasdl pd sdfjb which triggered World War II was the fake, simulated attack by the Germans on their own radio station near Gleiwitz on the Polish border.
Hey, If you need something to do give me a ring. Sounds like you've got too much time on your hands. Ha.ha. Great Blog.
If you keep playing with dynamite, that whole using your toes to pick thing up bit will come in handy!
Um...you are really fucking funny. I am laughing my ass off at this blog. It's my new favorite.
I saw a guy shart his pants at Wal-Mart once. I *know* it was a shart because when I went to the bathroom 10 minutes later, he was walking out... and there were a pair of shat in underwear on the floor of the bathroom.
dude - your blog is funny - I just wish all these chicks would look at MY blog!!! Unbelievable!
Maybe you need a hobby...
You forgot curing that Africa place of famine. All you have to do is play the guitar in the front yard and have your neighbors come out, watch, and discuss poverty. I played a drum solo last year and cured herpes in a small town in Ohio. It was rad.
#3. Are you also converting to Scientology? I hear Katie will be tutoring as soon as she is finished with her classes!
Be safe, *whispers* it's a dangerous world outthere - heard of some guys busting innocent neighbour gatherings with dynamite !
Hmmm ... an Entrepreneur that works out of a 6 x 6 x 6 cubicle. That's a rarity in itself - much like this humorous tid-bit of a blog. You're in my favorites now!
In response to your question of Ale8, you can find it on the net, but it's a little more expensive, like 3 bucks a bottle. But, the manufacturer is in somewhere in Northern KY.
You're a highlight of my day, baby. Number #28th, to be exact.
love this blog
i'm currently attending a community college majoring in architecture. i hope to own a firm one day.
I prefer to play Ice Climber but that means you have to use both hands and can’t drink during the game. I try to compensate that with a larger dose between.
http://www.drinklifein.com
Loved the Katie Holmes comment. That's great. But don't go spouting off that you're a genius at psychiatry and chemical imbalances aren't real or I'll start to think you have one!
Some fireworks have the equivalent of 1/4 stick of dymanite. We used to throw those into elevators just before they close.Instant hearing loss.
AHHHHHH. Those were the days!
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