Friday, August 12, 2005

Highlights of My Day

1. Considered what a chicken-pox outbreak would do for my sexlife
2. Hot glue gunned a bunch of my old trophies into one huge trophy
3. Dreamt I was the paperboy in the video game...Paperboy
4. In a crowded elevator, started yelling, "I think my water just broke!"
5. Sent out a bunch of resumes stating my name was Abe Lincoln, Bachelors of Science in Honesty, 2.35 GPA
6. Wore a pledge pin on my uniform
7. Me and my buddy Wyatt created a girlfriend
8. Attacked random people on the street with Silly String
9. Got into an arguement that Hillary Swank won her oscar for Karate Kid 3
10. Regained the record for who can hold their breath under water the longest at the pool...I beat Jaimie (9 yrs. old) by 5 Mississippi's


Blogger jdub said...

im first - haha

August 12, 2005 10:11 PM  
Blogger sillymeeg said...

#4- how'd that work for you?
#6- great movie
#8- damn, now I wanna try that
#9- you mean she didn't lol
#10- you go boy!

August 12, 2005 10:20 PM  
Blogger Camy Leon said...

So, what would the pox do to your sex life? Upgrade or Downgrade?

I want you to post pictures of this trophy thing. I don't believe you, besides, it'd be cool to see.

This B;og is hot! - The poor Hispanic man's Nicole Richie.

August 12, 2005 10:47 PM  
Blogger Traceysiobhan said...

I linked you on my family blog.

The hubby & I think it's funny,
but my father-in-law wants to know what drugs I'm taking.

August 12, 2005 11:03 PM  
Blogger BadGod said...

5th comment fuckers!

August 12, 2005 11:09 PM  
Blogger the captain said...

I know this is sad, but Hilary Swank was in the 4th karate kid, The Next Karate Kid. I hate that I even posted this.

August 12, 2005 11:13 PM  
Blogger Jason said...

An eventfull day to be sure.
I have no trophies to hot glue togather, but I used to mke hot glue body armor for G.I. Joe fugures then send them flying through the air tied to giant bottle rockets.

August 12, 2005 11:27 PM  
Blogger Lady K said...

I LOVE attacking people with silly string. It's WAY better than water balloons...or eggs, for that matter.

You crack me up EVERY day, and you are permanently linked.

80's name of the day: Travels with Bill & Ted

August 12, 2005 11:32 PM  
Blogger HappyKap said...

What, no farts today?

August 12, 2005 11:53 PM  
Anonymous Anderson said...


August 13, 2005 12:05 AM  
Blogger platkat said...

Here's one: *BRAP!*

Excuse me.

August 13, 2005 1:41 AM  
Blogger jellofishy said...

ashtray ashtray

August 13, 2005 3:09 AM  
Blogger Prométhiûs said...

Mukakaeee..very nice,...

August 13, 2005 5:47 AM  
Blogger austinizer said...

you even make my vacation funnier. eee awwww eeee awwww

August 13, 2005 5:55 AM  
Blogger Rayner said...

why do u always ask what everything does for your sex life???? - i am just curious!!!!

August 13, 2005 6:45 AM  
Blogger Princess Pessimism said...

Gluing your trophies together is the BEST idea i've ever heard! You're brilliance never ceases to amaze me

August 13, 2005 7:05 AM  
Blogger mofo said...

I am starting to feel bad for ya Brian. Not once have I seen "Got Laid" in your highlights. Either the sex is not a highlight or you need to find a way to start having it.... with other people. Soon.
I think having sex would do more for your sex life much more than a chicken-pox outbreak, bunk beds, or a dorsal fin.
Good luck with that.

August 13, 2005 7:28 AM  
Blogger Strumpet said...

In a crowded elevator, I often turn to the tall, handsome stranger next to me and say,
"You wanna have a quickie?"

A lot of my Porn-movie Fantasies start out with a Hot, Teenage Paperboy...

But, back when I was infatuated with all things Weird Science, there was just somethin' about Chet that turned me on entirely too much.

And, God, how I love a man in uniform.

Sweep the leg, Johnny.

The Pox? Upgrade, if your chick has had 'em before. Ain't no medicine like chicken soup and a blowjob.

August 13, 2005 7:48 AM  
Blogger blair said...

ok, i know i'm a little late to the 80's Indian Naming Party...

breakdances with big hair

Lie of the day: one day, i actually did shit a brick!

August 13, 2005 8:46 AM  
Blogger Johnny Retail said...

Why do people click the evelator button more than once? The light is on and they still click away. Some even hold and lean on the thing until it arrives.

I guess these people are the same ones waiting for a bus that keep looking at their watches every 2 minutes and then looking down the road. Yeah, keep doing that, I'm sure the bus will magically appear in front of you and your watch will be the exact time as the bus schedules.

August 13, 2005 8:52 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

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I have a alopecia hair loss related site.
It pretty much covers alopecia hair loss related topics.

Check it out if you get some time.

August 13, 2005 8:57 AM  
Blogger FU said...

oh you blogged! thank u! i got my fix. you're like heroin. i swear i saw a baby with a spinning head on the ceiling last night.

i know.. sad.

August 13, 2005 9:08 AM  
Blogger LBseahag said...

Hello from Los Angeles...
you are way hot...great blog.let's make out.

August 13, 2005 9:20 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

waiting for fredo...

August 13, 2005 9:22 AM  
Blogger Ora Najwa said...

I am actually quite amused by your Wishlist. Good Luck with that!

August 13, 2005 10:31 AM  
Blogger Strumpet said...

I've decided to place myself upon the list of people that want to make out with you.

I'm jumping on the bandwagon, damn it!

I don't ususally succumb to trends, but the thought of it is entirely too enticing...

August 13, 2005 10:56 AM  
Blogger immixmarketer said...

Welcome to the club...I have to say you and I enjoy the same movie. where the boys aren't

August 13, 2005 11:30 AM  
Blogger jennieseven said...

oddly fascinating as ever:) you are linked!

August 13, 2005 12:09 PM  
Blogger msbrooksie said...

Will You Marry Me?

August 13, 2005 1:02 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

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August 13, 2005 1:07 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Hey, you have a great blog here! I'm definitely going to bookmark you!

I have a tapety site/blog. It pretty much covers tapety related stuff.

Come and check it out if you get time :-)

August 13, 2005 1:22 PM  
Blogger babs said...

can you hook me up with wyatt?

August 13, 2005 1:22 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

You're girlfriend is hot.
80's bangs rock my face.

August 13, 2005 2:02 PM  
Blogger monsterhack said...

#1-what did you come up with?
#10 - so said, a 9yr. old.

August 13, 2005 2:22 PM  
Blogger Gary said...

I believe I got your resume yesterday.

August 13, 2005 5:06 PM  
Anonymous hair club said...

Hey, where's Fredo today??? Come on, Fredo, don't leave me hanging out here clutching to the memory of you pulling on that Atari joystick!! I had to lick my Brillo pad just to keep from getting the shakes... HURRY UP!

August 13, 2005 5:34 PM  
Blogger Yaz said...

You are fuckin' hilarious. I'm linkin' to you as we speak.


August 13, 2005 6:00 PM  
Blogger Lake Allison said...

Chicken pox?
No way, go for rabies!

I tell you, rabies are fucking HOT!

Mouth foam, bloodthirst, oh yeah!

August 13, 2005 6:31 PM  
Blogger Just Me said...

Is there anything you don't think could improve your sexlife?

August 13, 2005 7:21 PM  
Blogger PINKSandROSES said...

i love the game paperboy. have you ever played it in the aracde with the actual bike handles? great stuff!

August 13, 2005 8:23 PM  
Blogger Fredo Teabaggins said...

You know, I think some chaps would improve my sex life. That and some Spanish Fly.

August 13, 2005 9:14 PM  
Blogger misscate_hrhrosanna said...

I don't know about the chicken pox idea... Interesting comment. Keep us posted.

Love the silly string idea - should be fun to attack randoms with a child toy. Will have to try it one day.

August 13, 2005 10:26 PM  
Blogger Carlyjayjay said...

I feel this is the right forum in which to confess: I did not let my microwave canneloni sit for the recommended two minutes before consuming.

So sue me, biznatches.

August 13, 2005 11:44 PM  
Blogger Strumpet said...

It's a whole series, Mr. Friday.

And it's fantastic.

And it's really fun to make out while it plays in the background!

August 14, 2005 12:04 AM  
Blogger Strumpet said...


Chaps can and WILL improve your sexlife.....even more so if they're of the assless variety.

August 14, 2005 12:09 AM  
Blogger Chef Tom said...

Your water broke?!? And here I've been passing wind in elevators my whole life like a chump!

August 14, 2005 6:19 AM  
Anonymous hair club said...

Yes, Fredo.... you in chaps!!! I'd pay to see that one! Bring it on, baby!!! Who needs Spanish Fly when you could have me to make you hot...your Mexican Butterfly!!

August 14, 2005 6:24 AM  
Anonymous hair club said...

Wait... I forgot to add...make sure those chaps are pink and fuzzy...should accent your wonderful hair color!

August 14, 2005 6:27 AM  
Blogger Danielle said...


August 14, 2005 7:28 AM  
Blogger PoliticalGirl said...

Sadly, even the chicken pox would probably improve my sex life. Bri, you always make me smile.

August 14, 2005 9:03 AM  
Blogger the elissawanian said...

I agree with no_puzzy_4_ju!!!!! I want pictures of the uber trophy! Stop yanking our chains big guy!

August 14, 2005 9:04 AM  
Blogger William AHN said...

Can I comment here?
I open new blog..And I want to advertising my one!
So I click 'next blog'.. And I found your blog!
Is it such a coinsidence? Or Our destiny? KK
Anyway I enjoy your blog and I guess I can know how other country people are now living(their casual life)..
I will drop often and leave a momment... Can I? HH..

August 14, 2005 10:03 AM  
Blogger Stefanie said...

I have chicken pox so I don't think your little "blog" is very funny. Why not make fun of people with Hep C or stroke victims? Leave us chicken pox sufferers out of your little games please.

August 14, 2005 10:12 AM  
Blogger lpt said...

Guilty pleasure: reading the fart flavor of the day

August 14, 2005 11:04 AM  
Blogger William AHN said...

This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.

August 14, 2005 12:12 PM  
Blogger Paint it Black said...

This is like the best blogger I've ever been to.

August 14, 2005 12:50 PM  
Blogger eCynic said...

The world needs more people like you.

August 14, 2005 3:12 PM  
Blogger Zanderlilly said...

Great list. I love the refrences to the old Nintendo games.

August 14, 2005 3:37 PM  
Blogger BULLSEYE said...

Well alrighty then!

August 14, 2005 5:46 PM  
Blogger Jo said...

Hilarious........keep the laughs coming.

August 14, 2005 6:01 PM  
Blogger Fredo Teabaggins said...

I thought all chaps were, by nature, assless?

August 14, 2005 8:58 PM  
Anonymous Angel1274 said...

You absolutely kill me. I just discovered your blog and you totally crack me up.

August 14, 2005 9:59 PM  
Blogger Zepplinlady said...

HA! With my luck, I'd spray Silly String & they'd come back with a can of Mace on my ace... 5 Mississippi's huh? So what was the actual recorded time?

August 14, 2005 10:04 PM  
Blogger Zepplinlady said...

BTW, I love that guy screaming about the pledge pin.

August 14, 2005 10:06 PM  
Blogger Doctor Who said...

You are such a qwazy guy!!!!

August 15, 2005 1:24 AM  
Blogger Bryan said...

nice check out my blog:

August 15, 2005 1:35 AM  
Blogger rhein said...

qwazy make the world go wound!

August 15, 2005 4:24 AM  
Blogger jimmmer said...

Elevators are the best place to go nuts, people have nowhere to go!

August 15, 2005 5:08 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

i eat chicken pox for breakfast! oh wee oh wee oh

August 15, 2005 5:15 AM  
Blogger austinizer said...

i eat chicken pox for breakfast! oh wee oh wee oh

August 15, 2005 5:15 AM  
Anonymous Angel1274 said...

I just reread this entry and I can't believe how much it makes me laugh. I definitely have to try #4 & #8. Keep them coming.

August 15, 2005 6:19 AM  
Blogger Angelica Sidious said...

Once again, probably the first and only laugh of my pathetic day.

August 15, 2005 6:42 AM  
Blogger Princess Sushma said...

Cute, I guess reading a Friday blog on a Monday should make the day go by quicker. Funny, I have to say.

August 15, 2005 7:44 AM  
Blogger Sherri said...

I silly stringed the guy on the other side of my cubicle wall this morning! Everyone must do that at least once. :)

August 15, 2005 7:51 AM  
Blogger R2K said...

Master Lesbian...

August 15, 2005 8:00 AM  
Anonymous Lady Hearteater said...

LOL you crack me up every day! Finally got my 80's name of the day: Wonders Where's the Beef?

August 15, 2005 9:25 AM  
Blogger Nikky Egland said...

I would have to say chicken pox would be good if you were after the nurturing type - most people have already had the disease and are unlikely to get it again, so if a gal felt sorry for you, I guess it might work...

August 15, 2005 10:00 AM  
Blogger lookingbusy said...

Congratulations, anybody that can hold their breath underwater for 11 Mississippis deserves an award!

August 15, 2005 10:06 AM  
Blogger American Girl said...

80s name: Dances with Jem and the Rockers

August 15, 2005 10:47 AM  
Blogger Kay Ray said...

Very Funny!!I think im like #80 on this thing DAMN

August 15, 2005 12:30 PM  
Blogger Strumpet said...

They're all assless if you wear them sans pants underneath.

It's all about easy-access.

Especially in a crowded elevator.

August 15, 2005 1:12 PM  
Blogger LilTanLines said...

Aweeeeeeeeee... No 80's Name of the day! Whats up!

August 15, 2005 1:58 PM  
Blogger the captain said...

Just doing part of my 12 step by helping you get to 100 comments.

August 15, 2005 2:25 PM  
Blogger The DWG said...

Good idea, captain. Only 16 more to go. Highlight of my day: Clicking on the "girlfriend" link in #7. Laughed out loud.

August 15, 2005 2:58 PM  
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August 15, 2005 3:07 PM  
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August 15, 2005 3:57 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

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August 15, 2005 3:59 PM  
Blogger allison said...

make-out club?

love the fact that you beat Jaimie by 5 mississippi's.

August 15, 2005 4:09 PM  
Blogger Strumpet said...

Oooo...Allison, I do believe you're onto something with the "make-out club" idea.

What a fucking concept!

Can I be Club Secretary?

August 15, 2005 4:35 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

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Production for the groundbreaking television series "Noah's Arc" was temporarily shut down Aug.
Great info dude. I really enjoy reading blogs! I have voice conference call site. It really is about voice conference call and stuff. Check it out some time.

August 15, 2005 4:40 PM  
Blogger mofo said...

Strumpet -

In this club it is known as the Club Suckretary.

Still interested?

August 15, 2005 5:04 PM  
Blogger Trixie said...

Do you need help with your sex life dude?

August 15, 2005 6:05 PM  
Blogger Trixie said...

I have many blogspots but this one is the flipside to Brian's

Things that make you go hmmmm....

Hey dud is you reach 100 do we all get a free t shirt!?

August 15, 2005 6:24 PM  
Blogger Starla said...

I can't believe anyone still remembers the karate kid...

enjoyed your blog!

August 15, 2005 7:49 PM  
Blogger Todd Ruth said...

Great blog... check me out at

August 15, 2005 8:10 PM  
Blogger Strumpet said...

Why do you think I want to be Club Secretary, Mr. Mofo?

I have lots of dirty, little secretary fantasies that need fulfilling.

Besides, my ability to multi-task is beyond your wildest imagination.

Plus, I have excellent people skills!

Call me whatever you like.

August 15, 2005 9:04 PM  
Blogger beernazi said...

Elisabeth Shue was the best Karate Kid bunny by far.

What do you think talking like Mr. Miyagi would do for your sex life?

August 15, 2005 10:39 PM  
Blogger Strumpet said...

Ms. Shue is an Uber Sex kitten. Indeed. Ever see Leaving Las Vegas?

I could dig on Miyagi-speak sex talk action. I like being told what to do. Stroke up, stroke down. Lick left, lick right. Rub here, rub there.

And then he could do that thing where he claps his hands, magically touches you and makes everything better.

August 15, 2005 11:49 PM  
Blogger John Bryson said...

Fredo, people always say "You catch more flies with honey" But I say, you catch more honies with Spanish fly.

August 16, 2005 3:14 AM  
Blogger sharonb said...

knock knock..always a pleasure to visit here for sure!! it's your friendly neighborhood fairy bringing your greetings. sorry i havent stopped by sooner but my wings were in the repair shop. all is well now tho. hugs and smooches!

August 16, 2005 5:31 AM  
Blogger Curious1 said...

Alright Fredo... Dude your Do lightens up my day all the time!!!

Another thing, ain't no one makin out without me in the club... Ya'll can have me be security.

C'mon Brian, you'll always beat a 9 yr. old when you're the one dunkin their head in the water...

August 16, 2005 7:56 AM  
Blogger Sanchy said...

Suggestions: Talk like Yoda for a day and see what people do.

Order a pizza and insist that it's dead before they deliver it. Make sure it was free-range.

Go around pretending you're Kevin Klein

August 16, 2005 8:59 AM  
Blogger Fridaysweb said...

You should feel privelaged, or shall I? You have now been added to the links within my own blog. Please keep us laughing. And scratching our heads.

August 16, 2005 9:36 AM  
Blogger Curious1 said...

If any of ya'll into hip hop. Come check me at my site where I display some of my emceeing skills and battle some issues within the hip hop community.


August 16, 2005 1:04 PM  
Blogger tramster said...

i like pressing all the buttons in the elavator and then getting out

August 16, 2005 1:35 PM  
Blogger BurnTees said...

i think you'd enjoy my website... check it out. we have a blog too on here...

August 16, 2005 1:41 PM  
Blogger beernazi said...

I hate hip hop more than those feminin hygene commercials on TV

August 16, 2005 3:11 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Free iPods in the UK,America and Canada.
100% genuine, well worth checking out or telling a friend about.

August 16, 2005 3:48 PM  
Blogger m3 said...

Great website!

August 16, 2005 5:42 PM  
Blogger T.L. Barker said...

#2 I once melted a bunch of army men into one army man mutant.

August 17, 2005 8:51 PM  
Blogger Strumpet said...

Jorge, if you're security, does that mean you'll be watchin'? Cos that's hot.

Yoda speak = also hot.

Me you do long all night.

August 18, 2005 2:32 AM  

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