Highlights of My Day
1. Threw a fit
2. Seriously considered getting a "bowl" haircut
3. Ran out of lunch meat...invented the Doritos sandwich
4. Mapquested the North Pole
5. Shat out a T-bone
6. Wondered if people still get braces, or if that was just a fad of the 80's & 90's
7. Continued my quest to track down Don Lupre, and kick his ass
8. Farts are smelling like black liquorish and orange juice
9. Sent in a request to be on MTV Made...I want to learn how to make somebody my prison bitch
10. Re-named the STD term for "the clap" to "the applause"
2. Seriously considered getting a "bowl" haircut
3. Ran out of lunch meat...invented the Doritos sandwich
4. Mapquested the North Pole
5. Shat out a T-bone
6. Wondered if people still get braces, or if that was just a fad of the 80's & 90's
7. Continued my quest to track down Don Lupre, and kick his ass
8. Farts are smelling like black liquorish and orange juice
9. Sent in a request to be on MTV Made...I want to learn how to make somebody my prison bitch
10. Re-named the STD term for "the clap" to "the applause"
posted by immixmarketer at 3:00 PM
65 Comments:
Why did you throw a fit? Because you ran out of lunch meat and stole credit for the Doritos sandwich I inveted?
P/S Only Nacho Cheese counts, none of the pussy Cool Ranch Doritos...
Actually, I invented and patented the Doritos sandwich, seriously. Also the Cheetoes and Pringles 'wiches.
now I'm hungry. Damn
I’ve been waiting for you to post. I ran into this and thought TCF crowd will LOVE this
http://www.madman.com.au/trailers/quicktime/tism/winner_albedit_high.mov
Okay sorry
I ment to do this
I wish I had that many highlights in my day...I'm soooooo bored!
Nice site. I love the picture.
Let's reconsider the "bowl" cut my friend. We dont' need anoth Joey Lawrence... Whoa!
Yes, people DO actually still get braces, they're just invisible now-a-days. Gone are the colored elastics, my firend.
Applause to you for raising the bar on thd STD names. "The Applause" is so much classier!
Hey hey, you're the Monkees!
So how far is the North Pole? I'd throw a fit too if I didn't have lunch meat and had to have a Doritos sandwich.
std ay
wat u mean by clap thing
I kicked the North Pole's ass one time. The North Pole is a total pussy, though. I recommend dragging Lupre to the South Pole -- much more street than the North.
Your ability to clap will come in hady with a prison bitch.
How does one become a prison bitch?!?!?! By dropping the soap in the shower???
Ok why DID you throw a fit? Does that mean you are really tone now? Is that a new workout routine?
"You too can have a tone body with Throw a Fit workout. Jsut throw a fit once a day at least and watch those pounds melt away. For finer toning throw a fit more than once a day. To shed off extra pounds in minutes throw a fit in a public place and be hauled away by the cops! Eating jail food will increase the chances of weight loss."
dammit, i want doritos too. that easy mac i had for lunch is NOT cutting it anymore.
Hmmmmm........bowl haircut. You're quite the trendsetter!
is the profile picture really you? Let us know if MTV accepts you. I'll be watching, for sure.
Dude if u shat out a t-bone ur ass is ripped.
Renegade
your thought for the day is "Not found"
how profound
Hey, I've been reading your blog for quite some time now. Hilarious stuff.
What I wanna know is, why fart and waste it if you can burp and taste it?
Drop by my place sometime.
I applaud you! Would like to see your bowl cut if you get it. I don't like licorice, but that combination is interesting.
1. Did it last long?
2. The chilli "bowl" haircut beats a mullet any day.
3. I've invented the bread sandwhich.
4. Why north? What's wrong with the South pole?
5. Sounds painful.
6. Definitely a fad, nowadays braces are hidden.
7. You wouldn't need back up, but I'd like to have your back; just let me get one good roundhouse kick in.
8. My farts smell like, well, farts.
9. If you get this wish, and you cell mate has to be made your beeyatch, would you rather he fight back against it, or just give in to you?
10. I've renamed the Zen Koan of "Make the sound of one hand clapping" to "Make the sound of one STD".
Your blog is awesome and your posts are just absolutely hilarious!
And about your wishlist...
why would you want a Dora the Explorer bucket and shovel?
Hi Brian!
Just wanted to say that i'm quite impressed.... not many people really grasp the proper usage of the term "shat". Kudos to you.
-Rachel-
I once applied to be a VJ on MTV and they sent me back a coupon for $45 off a straight-jacket and the name of a good psychologist in my area. I don't think they liked my audition tape.
Blake
Those are some *sweet* pictures you have going on your ads!
I only visit your blog to see what Fredo Teabaggins has to say. Thank you.
Am i the only one craving some black liquorish and orange juice?
Don't say I never gave you anything...
http://www.drunkcyclist.com/prison_name_generator.htm
I like what's going on here, you're doing very well for yourself...as far as blogs go.
Also, I came 'this close' to ordering the 'more cowbell' shirt but I closed the window when the shipping to Canada cost more than the shirt. Les boos (that's french for boooo.)
This is a killer blog - nice job
http://rawski.blogspot.com/
Rubes, it could only be because Dora, the Explorer, is mad sexy.
And, Daddy, thank you for inventing reservoir-tip rubbers. Thank you very much.
Mr. Teabaggins.....tsk, tsk...
Great site!
Help us find the Daily Show Couch.
Shop AllpromDresses
I don't go on vacation anymore. I just take trips via Google Earth. Cheap. No terrorists. And I got in so close one time I could see my ass crack as I was bent over fixing my El Camino.
Hey I've been lurking for about a week now... You definitely come up with some funny ass shit!
Love the Doritos sandwich bit. Been there my friend. Try making yourself a Ramen Noodle casserole sprinkled with crushed Doritos on top. You haven't actually hit total rock bottom in the grocery department until you start creating recipes for all the sucky food left in the cabinet you don't want to eat. In fact.... maybe that can be a highlight for another day. :-)
My dog's farts smell like sauerkraut.
*bhah*
the sound I make when I read your blog...
thanks for the laugh
i love MTV's made, you should totally do it
Christ No 5 had to hurt... he's a really big shit!
so many highlights, so little time, great writing.
More funny stuff here today. my other favorite blog.
http://dumpdigest.blogspot.com/
dude, what are you eating....anytime your gas smells like liquorish and OJ means there could be problems.
by they way, the new baked cool ranch dorito's are amazing.
You might want to get that checked out !
This has nothing to do with your list, but I love Mac-n-cheese (original kind, not the creamy stuff) and sour cream and onion chips crushed up in the mac-n-cheese. YUMMMM
If for no other reason, we are destined to be friends based on our mutual respect for "Gleaming the Cube." Rock.
Holy hell! Who's the travel pimp whoring their travel blogs on the comment section. That's cheap and dirty, like a prostitute from my home town.
K, seriously, you haven't even posted today and your comments keep racking up! wth? (actually, i just wanted to fit "rack" in there somewhere) you're still my blog hero.
Were you at my house today? I mean seriously I got out of the car when I got home and I was like "gross it smells like black liquorish out here"
I'm totally not joking.
Yes, people still get braces. I saw this Vietnamese girl with braces two days ago. So there ya go.
Join us, joooooooooooooin us.
Dude, how do you get so many comments off one post?
We're new, but I hope we get this number of people checking us out.
Laters
I like your blog. It is original and interesting! I don't know how you get so many comments. That's amazing!
I invented the ham, cheese, and Ruffles sandwich years ago. But, the Doritos sandwich is a step forward.
This is a Tuesday, but it ain't casual for me.
Found this Blog today very cool
People are still getting braces.
:O) Still the best blog out there.
http://r2000.blogspot.com
Brian--I so defended your butt in a comment on the life and times of joesph mcconell's blog---he totally stole your bit.
http://joeymcconnell.blogspot.com
This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.
Thanks! That kid is a punk.
I would have called him out on it earlier, but I'm trying not to give him any attention.
Holy shit, Pimpia is dropping comments so she can get people to sign up for a porn site. Now that's crazy! Why would I pay for porn when I can get it for free?! Jeeeeesh.
you'll need to grow out for the the bowl cut.
should only take about 6 months, but it's the in-between stage that's the bitch.
Bowl-cuts are hot. White hot.
You'll definitely need to grow that shit out, though. Good things come to those who wait.
Rockin' the bowl-cut should suit you well, I support you 100%.
I'm not even being funny.
yes people still have braces and NO THEY ARE NOT INVISIBLE unfoutionatlly
Oh, my god! How did you get a picture of my brother?
Hi- good blog where can I get a donation sign just like yours, coz I need donations too! regards cathy another blogger please email me ,,,thanks catherinewalker2003@yahoo.com.au
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